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Friday, July 31, 2009
You were one of our best friends. We've gone through thick and thin. Though a characteristic of yours. Your angerness that acts with impatience. We've tolerated that for quite a long time. Now, it has gone over the limit. This is serious business. Warning! It's not gonna be nice... ... Wrath boils in my blood. Telling me to hate. Hate for what you've done to us. Anger from many different things. I'm gonna let it go, speak it out. Tell them what this anger is all about. Though when I do speak out. So many things go wrong. Gentled down my voice so that my anger won't take control of me. But you, just ignored all of the consequences. WHAT WAS THAT SHOUTING ALL ABOUT? Our motive was to confront you. Just let all your feelings out. (not all your anger!) Share your pain with us. (but not your anger!!) Solve this problem together. (It's not all about you!) Aren't this what friends are for? Talk it out, like matured adults. Instead, you went bonkers. Crying and shouting is your only solution? Just like on that rainy day, We gathered all our thoughts. To simply lightened this burden of yours. But what did we get in return? A simple thanks to show your appreciation? (not at all, nada) What are we to you? Are we just nothing? Just a thing to keep you company? We know you have problems. (don't we all do?) Know that you do feel left out at times. (you're not the only one...) Expecting too much care from others. (isn't our care enough?) It's not all about you, you see. We've tried to tell you, so many times. (but you just wouldn't listen.) If you got that all figured out, then WHAT WAS THAT SHOUTING ALL ABOUT?! You might not realize this. But you have hurt us all. How dare you drag our dear friend into this situation? I won't accept that with a light heart. Can't you read between the lines? You had your chance to apologize for that sinful act of yours. (but you really threw it away) A simple sorry will never be enough. Imagine, if all of us were really drowning. Almost dying, and you may never get to see them again. Could you set aside your perceptions of "Who you're most closest to, or don't really talk to." "Who you care for the most, or who cares for you." These tittles are all just USELESS. Even if they're all different, aren't they all still your friends? I understand this character of yours. This disposition that is incapable of putting anything into words. But for once in your life, could you just play it cool? Can't you laugh a little, smile a little? Stop waiting for others to care for you. Stop waiting for others to make the first move. TREAT OTHERS THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED. Call us names, all the vulgarities you can ever think of. It's your mouth, I don't bother. But you've just gone too far. We're going down the same road again. I've said this once, (but you never listen) And I'm gonna say it again. WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND. Think about it. In this moment of time, I will NEVER forgive you that easily. You heard that. ... Now, I shall recite the poetry of VULGARITIES. The "F**K, I don't wanna read this shit anymore" button is just on the North-East corner of this page. Please meticulously make your way up there. Thank you and "Come again". ... FUCKING ASSHOLE. DID I EVER CALLED YOU CB. NOW THIS IS ALL FOR YOU. FUCKING BLOODY. FUCK.SHIT.FUCK.SHIT.FUCK.YOU.SHIT.FUCK.YOU.BLOODY.SHIT.SHITTY.FUCKY.BLOODY.SHIT! CHIBAI.BAKA.BAKA.BAKA.CHIBAI.CHIBAI.ICHIBAN NO HONTONI WA SAITTE NA KANINABE lah! YOU FUCKING CRABPOT. BLABLABLABLA *ALL THE BAD WORDS COMING OUT FROM THE KEY BOARD* FUUYOOOOOH. Now I'm so tired... Tired of all this SHIT. Alright, won't waste my time thinking about this... Ataghfirullahalazim. Subhanallah. Innalillah. Okay I'm Done. Monday, July 27, 2009 Everybody's talking about it. It's everywhere. It's in the air. In movies, books, Tvs, songs, around the world. A kind of language that people speak. Though they say, it cleanses the heart, yet, it makes it burn. Still, everyone's yearning for it. How unique can this feeling be? Magic, maybe. Will there be a work of fires on the first encounter? A shooting star across the sky? It embraces the world. Embracing the heart, when it's in pain. That special thing. Once you find it, you must hold on tight. It may hurt to let go. But that's the only thing that makes us want more. Some people sacrifice their life for it. Is it worth sacrificing for? Does it... last forever? Is it true? Does it exist? Well, I've yet to know. -a secret. shhhh! Wednesday, July 15, 2009 Water dripping down my face. Tasting the saltiness down my mouth. It's nothing new. I can't see and everything's a blur. I close my eyes. Try to get my breath back, stop sobbing. But it's a failed attempt. The sobs came back, harder this time, stronger. I'm fighting for air. But it feels like I'm fighting for my life. My heart beat's got out of tempo, uncontrolled. Am I so weak? Why? I don't know. These tears, what am I crying for? They say, the sun and moon are bright. But they don't shine for me. Is it the same for all? This sadness? That dwells within us, like a neverending sickness. When you have everything, your dear family and friends, yet, do you ever feel so lonely at times? But am I being selfish that way? Is it such a brutal way of thinking? I'm weaker than anyone thinks. For that matter, all humans are naturally weak. When your mind tells you to give up, but your heart tells you to stay strong. When your mind tells you to stop, but your heart just keeps going on. Some say, our minds and hearts are connected in a special way. But the mind is just the mind. And the heart is just the heart. They can either be as one, or just betray each other. When you're trying to reach out for something, no matter how much you stretch your hands, you can never reach it. When you desperately wants someone to understand you, your pain, but no one can. And when you truthfully wants to understand someone, his/her pain, but you just can't. When you're pleading for someone's attention, your voice trying to reach them. But you're just completely unheard, ignored and neglected. When you're surrounded by the ones you love, yet you still feel so separated. These feelings, they might be little, but they hurts a darn lot. Are we all just alone? Imagine, everyone is somehow stuck on their own little deserted island. With no guidance, no one at all. Just you, yourself and you. Only depending on hope and faith. The only thing that makes you go on. But wanting to find a way out of this deserted island. You swim out to the open dangerous sea. Knowing that you may never come back to the only place you can ever feel safe. Swim out with all your might. And when the storm came, you hold on tight. But the strong currents pushes you away. Break away from the little thing called faith. With helplessness in your eyes, will you ever make it through this storm? No one leads a problem-free life. They say happiness isn't forever. But sadness last a lifetime. Even knowing that, even if our wishes didn't come true, can we ever feel a tiny bit of true happiness? Will I ever? I want.. to smile knowing, believing that everything will be alright. To go forward, believing that there's someone beside me. To run with all my might, without have my lungs to plead for air and my heart screaming in pain. I want to feel that little bit of true happiness. Though I know that it isn't forever. Will there be a light at the end of the tunnel? Saturday, July 11, 2009 Smile, though you heart is aching. Smile, even though it's breaking. When there are clouds in the sky, You'll get by... If you smile with your fear and sorrow. Smile and maybe tomorrow. You'll find up that life is still worthwhile If you'll just... Light up your face with gladness. Hide every trace of sadness. Although a tear maybe ever so near. That's the time you must keep on trying. Smile, what's the use of crying? You'll find that life is still worthwhile, If you'll just... Smile, though your heart is aching. Smile, even though it's breaking. When there are clouds in the sky, You'll get by. If you smile, through your fear and sorrow. Smile and maybe tomorrow. You'll find that life is still worthwhile, If you'll just smile. That's the time you must keep on trying. Smile, what's the use of crying? You'll find that life is still worthwhile, If you'll just smile... So, SMILE! -MJ (: Wednesday, July 8, 2009 It was just like any other day, we sat, staring out the glass window. Sighing to ourselves, all the thoughts that's been running through our heads, repeating all the scenes that had happen, over and over again. Thinking, "Why?" The only word that came out from your cold, tricking mouth was Bye. You lied to us, You hurt us, And yet, you've caused a tear to fall from our dear friend. Do you think saying "sorry" is enough? Do you think it will wipe these tears off? Do you think it will heal our torn hearts? Yes, you said you hated people Who can't see through others hearts. Yet, you can't even see through ours. People's feeling cannot be comprehended that easily. You don't even know the reason why we're upset. It's not that we're taking it too hard. It's the carelessness of your action, so very thoughtless, that hurt us deeply. Still, we're able to smile, and act like everything's okay. Well, my friend, What goes around comes around.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009 "I'm hopeless; yet I'm still hoping for a miracle to happen. I'm alone; still I'm longing for someone,anyone, to be there. I cry; though I know that these tears won't bring back the memories. I smile; even though I know that nothing is gonna be alright. I listened; to the part of me that tells me to stay strong, to fight the bad thoughts. I ignored; the whispers of another part of me that's only bringing me down, a reflection of a weak self-confidence. Yet, in the end, I'm only lying to myself."
Thursday, July 2, 2009 "Climb up, over the top. Survey the state of your soul. You've gotta find out for yourself whether or not your truly trying. Why not, give it a shot? Shake it, take control and inevitably wind up. Find out for yourself all the strength that you have inside you." Back to that Place of Slow but Sure Body Cramping, Mind-Numbing, Fun-Killing Torture, Boring-Blabbing of Teachers, More Drooling Sleeps and Just Plain Dull a.k.a School. Since the june holidays were over, I proudly yet guiltily confess that I did NOTHING at all during the holidays. Didn't even touch a single book. Well, flashback during recess... My friends were all in deep conversations, looking all serious. While listening, was concentrating on cutting that piece of chicken. My stomach was growling for more. So, "CRACK!". The pathetic spoon broke. As if it's head were cut off. And they all burst out laughing. What a way to break out of those serious faces! Oh wells, it's plastic after all. It couldn't handle any excess force. E-maths lesson, Started on money exchange. At first, it was hard to comprehend. And then I needed bread, Cause my mind were all JAMmed up. I know this is freaking lame. =.= Oh wells. (: |
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